Sleeping with the enemy. -Antonello, go home! - At these words, the neighbor has shrunk into himself. With a small old woman became a dwarf. Humbly podkuliłam head, apologized and left. Extinguished.
De Silva sighed. We both know that in an apartment behind a husband mistreating his wife. They are both retired, so he spends his free time watching television, rozkazywaniu wife, and sometimes lining the principles of the superiority of man over woman in practice. She is a housewife, cleans, cooks and cures painful evidence of her husband 's lectures. She gave up entirely subordinate, underwent a number of years for the sake of the children, for the sake of peace.
Executioner one is not born, but it is slowly becoming. Al does not remember the specific date when her husband turned into a tyrant. It was a process. Husband tłamsił it slowly, in stages, initially limited her contacts with friends, then began to decide on every expenditure, every visit, out of the house. Ala was young and in love to the ears. Initially, a trusted man, gave no further fighting bastions of its own sovereignty. After several years has been to the sea, and although bothered her life in fear of their own husband, she was convinced that without it you can not cope. My husband decided about everything (with whom, where, how), and even took her salary.
getting stuck in the toxic compound was interrupted by the evidence of treason. In the natural reflex Al took the kids and moved out to my mother. Yet that same night, she panicked. She was crying, that does not make it. She repeated like a mantra lies, which fed her husband: that it is resourceless that without it nothing can do, nor know how to make a decision to do anything that is not suitable. Were it not for my mother, probably would be moved "tail tucked" the tyrant and adopted again their terms. Mom asked who pays the bills, doing shopping, cleaning, deliver children to kindergarten, going on with them to the doctor, resolve the problem in the cooperative. Each question has only one answer-Ala, herself. Slowly it began to open eyes that have long been her husband did nothing for either home or family. Then it emerged that have long kept their Ala., when her husband seemed a lot of money on the side.
When Anne thinks about his current situation, it alone can not believe how it happened. How could degrade to give her husband to the role of servant, or even lower? Janet-married
Ani-signed a very attractive, two-year contract to work abroad. They left for France. For neither was it a big change, I did not know the language, but above all had to give up break from work and studies. They lived in the provinces, because Jack had dreamed of a quiet life in a detached house. They had to have one car, which the husband went to work. In this way, Anna got stuck with several years of her son in a picturesque village with no public transportation, without friends, without the knowledge of indigenous peoples, without their own source of income. Like everything was common, but the car was Janka, his former money, his bank account to which she had no authority. Of course, able to take the car if you have previously agreed to with her husband, and more on its allowed. Of course, he gave her money, if approved the expenditure.
trip abroad was to be to let the financial injection, but for Ani became the basis for addiction, servitude, because without the consent of Janina could not do anything-it just was not her stand. My husband he could simply not agree on the expenditure and do not give money. Future autumn frosts, and their son did not have a warm jacket. Jack did not give money to his wife claiming that it lacks taste and buy something "badziewnym color." They decided that together we will go to the store, but her husband did not have the time and week after week passed. Their son walked in the lazy and the windbreaker, to which Anne sewed a lining with an old blanket. Janek explained when lack of time and energy conservation. After 3 consecutive weeks, the husband agreed to go to the store and approved the purchase of jackets for their own child.
One day Anne received a phone call from Krause: "I'm in the hospital." Well, the husband had health problems and went for tests that have proved so unsuccessful that it was needed immediate surgery. Nor about your problems, or a visit to the doctor did not inform his wife-what? Their son was then in a distance of 15 km kindergarten. Anne had no means of transport to pick up a child in the portfolio, as usual, just a few euros. Her husband was just operated on while in the hospital, which was not even like to get. Coped. They helped their neighbors. They took, borrowed money, took care of the child.
Unfortunately, Janka this situation has not learned anything. After his return home to his wife again enumerated every penny, it has not authorized to access the account at the bank. Ba, Anne did not even know which bank they are supposedly "their money".
the Goblet overflowed, when Anne discovered that there is "other woman". Jack was confident enough, or stupid, that he had left evidence of their stuff to the laundry. Just like Ali, worked most ordinary human feelings. My husband did not want to talk to her, he just did not feel like it. Anne moved out and took his son. Jack flew into a rage. Blowing on friends, ordered the immediate return of the child's home and threatened police. The next day, even though he knew where he is their son, filed a report with his wife-accused her of kidnapping. An also to social welfare institutions to collect the child. Spice adds a small detail that he traveled for two days over the tropical seas of the so-called "friends" to spend two weeks there, but happily the branches did not intend to take (a wife is to be understood or not).
Even bystanders knew what was going on and that it was not a son of the struggle, but for dominance over his wife. Janek's blowing up from either the threatening, forbidding them to assist, "interfere," the police and threatened revenge for life. All this to hunt down his wife, who in exile could not rely on family support, it was not his own money, so without the help of friends, could not survive. He was mad because he lost control, because the stupid woman, instead of waiting until you want to talk to her, she began to twist the numbers. Mutinied, and yet could not, after all, was not able-effective to do so try.
maltretowanej wife team generally defined various types of consequences of violence against wives: physical violence (beating), emotional violence (bullying, verbal abuse), sexual, economic (deprivation of livelihood).
Usually women are not willing to officially accuse husbands (economic dependence, the belief that he will change, excessive passivity), while men justify themselves and justify their behavior provocation on the part of wife. Factors predisposing
include:
-young age of the wife, her poor education, lack of own revenue (from these rules there are exceptions)
-man with a low social status, low need for achievement, express feelings
-personality of the victim: passive, masochistic, depressive, passive-dependent, immature, anxiety
-launching of such a pattern of relationships from the family home. Sometimes
abuse starts at the first pregnancy, which is translated sexual frustration man, family lifestyle changes and behavior of his wife, an unwillingness to have a child. (By Zbigniew Lew-Starowicz: "Sexology court.")
Enough theory. In practice, when I hear one more time as a neighbor treats his seventy wife, and then watch the big bruises on her arms (the effects of lecture the superiority of man over woman), a knife in my pocket opens. I realize that in this particular situation, I can not do anything, because even the neighbor kids do not try to help her. Everyone is accustomed, they do not want change, if injured or not they want to.
But each time it grows within me the motivation to help neither. That this beautiful young woman did not follow the fate of our neighbors. In order not to lose faith that you can get out of the trap toxic compound.
